Grad School Massacre and the Greatest Defeat in Human History

Patrick Lane is an utter absolute failure, according to the advisory committees at 7 of the 8 grad schools I applied to. I heard back from Texas, Brown, and Vanderbilt within 2 days of each other, which prompted me into a near-catatonic depression. But that isn't even the worst thing to happen to me that week.

The Patriots, who I predicted to win Super Bowl XLII 55-19 in a glorious blowout....lost.

Yup. 17-14. Worst game of football I've ever seen. The Giants defensive line got after Brady much as the Soviet Third Army plundered the young female population of East Prussia during the 1945 drive toward Berlin. I don't want to live in a world where there the Manning Brothers are back-to-back Super Bowl MVPs at the expense of New England offensive miscues, but that is the lot I have been given.

BC basketball made me want to enter one of those crazy religious orders where you can't talk, masturbate, or watch TV, just so I could perhaps learn to let go of the pain of mediocre ACC hoops in a sequestered monastic prison of the self. Bloody awful. Tyrese Rice isn't as good as he thinks he is but that UNC game was a beauty.

BC hockey has the worst home season this decade but makes the 2 seed in Worcester with a Red Sox-esque run through the Hockey East Tournament, which happened to be perhaps the least magnetic post-season tournament I've ever seen. There was little to no crowd vitality and I found myself not so much enraptured by the BC-UNH triple overtime classic as I was chained to it like a 90-lb. crackwhore to a Mattapan radiator.

The Red Sox won this morning in Japan. I turned on the TV to Manny's 2-run double in the 6th and was mighty pleased. If I could start every morning like that I wouldn't need to run this graduate school gauntlet to make myself feel halfway decent everyday.

I don't really smoke anymore but the drinking has maintained itself nicely. A few beers, perhaps some wine, but I try not to delve into semi-inebriated self parody.

The NCAA tournament sucks. All this "OMG COLLEGE BASKETBALL IS THE BESTEST THING EVR!!!!!!!!11111!" is a big steaming truckload of malarkey. There is a reason half these teams play before empty arenas on ESPN during the regular season, and its because baseball and football are infinitely more cerebral than a game any college dropout with good genes can master at 19.